girl fight.

female competitiveness. makes you wonder how the situation got escalated to the point of a physical altercation.

coveting? a guy? deep hatred?

she didn't like her because she thought the other girl didn't like her?

women are so complex and yet so simple.

are we merely witnessing an archaic ritual that stems from cavewomen desperate to survive primitive life and her only hope was to seek out any male to protect her from the harsh evironmnet?

it's utter nonsense now.

aching.

having a broken arm is like being sick without actually being ill.
even though i'm not contagious, i've been isolated from the world.
i can't sleep and i'm afraid of the dark
--of remembering and not knowing.
all i can do is lay around,
which would be fine any other day, but not whlile i'm out of commission.
i can't even move a table. a table. i can hear it laughing at me.
i've had nurses bathe me.
had several probing needles- bring my worse fears to reality.
drilling my veins for samples.
i feel drained. i feel helpless. i feel alone.

i have mini-anxiety attacks when riding in cars.
everyone is too close. the lanes are too small.
it's the unknowing.
people constantly say it could have been worse-
as if i didn't know.
as if they were the ones coming to conciousness with a hand full of blood.
as if they saw the ghoustly white that painted the inside of the ambulance.
as if they know any clue what it feels like being next to a dying young man.
a mourning family entering.
or have their mother too weak to look at them.
to be placed inside machines.
being scanned and probed. not knowing.
being told not to move.
to want to remember. to want to know.
and to never want to remember and never want to know.

sit in the driver's seat. questioning the world.

#spring2010

[alexander wang.marc by marc jacobs.stella mccartney]

the look of spring has a name. and that name is lolitha.

it speaks to my youthful nature. i mean i look 15 so it works in a twisted way.

to be a nymphet.

pigtails.cherry red lipstick.bows.

[d&g.peter som.prada]

put your best face foward.

we've discussed boys. a fashion trends.
what could we be leaving out...
hmmm??
the FACE.
most days...the natural look is the best look.
a good mild facial cleanser and a light moisturizer.
go a long way.
but on special occasions. a little make-up can be



the infamous smokey eye.

if done wrong you look like a raccoon that has been punched in the eye.
i enjoy the color play.
you can see the dark green. dark brown. light brown. gold. silver.
you can not say make-up is not art.
she has a rainforest on you eyelid. it's amazing.
it's edgy.
and it's difficult. but there are many youtube videos that teach you how to accomplish these looks.


and my favorite look for quite sometime is the nude lip.

when wearing such a bold eye.
everything else has to be simple.
the eyes are suppose to be the focal point.
but that doesn't mean that you should just ignore your lips.
maybelline has a new color sensational lipstick.
it has more vibrant pigment. and a creamy feel on lips.
plus it looks very chic (if you ask me)

well. my beauty rant is complete. for now.

2010 going in.

courtesy of "the skinny" and style.com i am hyped up for these 2010 trends.
first is the new casual.
a good cropped blazer and a pair of boyfriend jeans.
[my own twist for the warm weather is cut off shorts]

second, the cat eye glasses.
i'm not a fan of the sunglasses.
but the neon eye glasses are to die for.
maybe i will get some prescription cat eye glasses.

spring got you sprung?

spring semester begins in just a few weeks. the flowers will awaken from their winter slumber. the cliché birds will be chirping. although it's only the fifth of january, we must think about the spring much sooner (and i promise it has nothing to do with my love of the sun *wink*)
for many it's the proverbial season for love. winter cuddling melts away and the heart seeks something warmer to comfort it. so as women we pull out our spring arsenal: the shorts and mini skirts reemerge into our wardrobe. but before falling head over heels into a field of flowers there are three specific men to be careful with this season:
7 for 1 deal: Guy in a Group
[this includes room mates, frat brothers or a guy with a massive number of bffs] just as guys don't like when girls listen to their friends opinions. it seems even more troubling for a girl to know her guy is receiving additional commentary from people outside the relationship.
→ date-ability: the fact that he can maintain friendships shows he is capable of nourishing a relationship and exhibits his loyalty. no one ever wants to feel as though they will always come in 8th place to friends. it takes a level of confidence and patience to overcome these feelings. a couple has to be able to balance their time together and their time away from each other. when the scale begins to tip either the partner or the patnas (tehe) will end up with the short end of the stick.
Glitter is Not Always Gold: All for the Swag
this guy is usually always f.r.e.s.h H2T (head to toe). he will be easy to spot- the guy decked out like the new years ball.
→ date-ability: you could be dealing with someone with an overactive ego. these guys are usually compensating for something they believe they lack or any other internal struggle. from my experience these guys are actually very misunderstood and their outward appearance intimidates others and in result generates negative backlash. or you could really be dealing with a jerk. be careful. look out for the signs. these guys are attracted greatly to a woman with confidence to compliment his style, so if this is the guy you want. stand straight. arms back. and strut.
Mr. Everything
more obvious to spot than the swagster is mr. everything. he is in 10 different places at once (head of the student government. aiding a friend. volunteering. doing the dishes. you get the picture) he is incredible everyone loves him and knows his name. sounds too good to be true right...well maybe.
→date-ability: when you date someone like this it can bring you into the spotlight right along with him, which have negative or positive response. (especially for those of not use to the limelight) this boost catapults you into popularity. people will know you for being with "him". you have to be ready for the scrutiny that comes along with the new found observers. they can be nice they can be mean, but know they are watching every move you make. so you put your best foot forward. my best advice is to be charming. let them see what a good person you are by yourself, with others and especially with your man. because know that the many of his "friends" could also be his "admirers". so what is equally important is to be able to convey confidence in the relationship.

→ so if you don't get anything out of this post remember that a little confidence goes a long way ←

it can't be..

...oh it is...

BATHING APES APPAREL
&&never looked so good.
bring in the new year. with a new look.